Wasted

I recently saw this really corny advertisement in a magazine for a ministry school. The headline of the page was, "Get Wasted." The underlying theme of the message was to give your life for causes that the world considers foolish.

For some reason, this message always makes a crunch inside of me. Shane and Shane sing a song begging God to waste them and use them for His name. Misty Edwards sings in the song Mystery: "I want to waste my life to search You out," and in the song Let Me Love You More, Edwards sings "I want to take my passion and put it in a bottle just to break them at your feet. I want to take my affections and put them in a bottle and waste them at your feet."

I am starting to get this idea now. He has anointed my life with certain characteristics, not just moments or certain songs. My heart longs for personal encounters, to find Him and not just the footprints where He
has been. A truth I heard last Sunday will not stop ringing in my ears: Jesus didn't die for humanity.
He wasted His life for individual relationship.

He calls us to a life of "Just Jesus."
Absolutely nothing else will do.

So my cry to God?

Break my heart for this community. I am tired of waiting for someone else to step up to the plate so that I can follow- what if no one else comes? Move me at the right time. I don't want to burn out from mis-placed passion. I don't want to miss the song this city needs to hear pour out from me. You have healed my brokenness and now I move forward. Bring me into a season of growth at Your pace, questions that always burn and an assurance that increases with each step.

I don't want to be a singer- I want to be a messenger of God's anointing. One who listens to His heart on the matter, not afraid to sing to Him in an empty room for the rest of my life if that means finding His presence.

Perhaps waiting in the mundane is not the worst thing to happen. In fact, this is often an important place to be, as it can prove to be a time of posturing to hear His voice or letting hopelessness and dis-belief take control.